What is happening to me? Orgasms have been removed from my existence and now I find myself exploring many different kinks, fetishes, preferences, whatever you call it. I am perfectly and miserably content with being denied orgasms. I rather enjoy being in a constant aroused fog. The high is natural and comfortably soothing.
I am also certain that I am a cuckquean wannabe. Nothing’s makes me wetter than thinking about my husband having sex with another woman, giving her the orgasms I’m denied. I find the thought beautifully degrading.
Today, for some unknown reason, I find myself really wanting to explore a bi-relationship. Like, I think I want to get naked with a woman and touch fun parts. I’ve never really done that but it’s all I can think about today.
Another thing that’s been going through my mind is having a desire to be in charge of a man’s orgasms. Not my husband because he deserves all the orgasms he wishes to have! Another guy. Someone who has a cock I can worship, tease, and torture by repeatedly bringing to the edge, only to be left denied. I want his cock locked away until i decide to let it out, and I want the only key! This is completely out of the ordinary for me because I am, by nature, extremely submissive.
It seems as though the longer I go without an orgasm, the more sexually open-minded I become and the more things I want to try!
Celebrating 20 Wonderfully Horrible Days Without An Orgasm
Jan. 21, 2018
Despite my husband’s expertise teasing abilities, I have made it to day 20 with no orgasms and I’ve never felt more fulfilled in my life. The feeling of being simultaneously sexually satisfied and sexually frustrated is pure ecstasy.
I’m not exactly model material. I have had 5 children, one by C-section, stretch marks, and I carry a little extra weight. You won’t find me on the cover of a magazine, unless proud mom body is a magazine, but I have never felt sexier or more desirable in my life. This morning, for the first time in my life, I went in public without wearing a bra. The feel of the button up shirt against my nipples is keeping me constantly wet.
When I started this journey, I set a goal of no orgasm for 2 months. This ends on March 1. Since setting that goal, I have given control of my orgasms to my husband. He may choose to never allow me another orgasm and honestly, that’s exactly what I’m hoping for. I love feeling constantly aroused. I have also discovered that I love pleasing my husband with my mouth and I crave the feel of his cum going down my throat, and I mean I seriously crave it, like a pregnant woman craves pickles and ice cream. Knowing that my husband is even more turned on because of my frustration as well as his acknowledgement that me giving him my orgasms is a gift, excites me and adds to my burning desire to do everything I can to please him. Last night it pleased him to rub orajel on my clit and then torture it. I couldn’t feel it when he was doing it but I can feel it today. It’s even more achy and needy today than I thought possible. It also pleased my husband to look and me as he was fucking me and telling me that he was going to cum soon, and when he did, he wanted me to hold my pussy open for him so he could shoot his load into my gaping hole. Just hearing those words made me want to cum and I had to use my breathing to stop myself from orgasming.
I have been given the task, from a friend I met on Tumblr, of composing an orgasm denial contract. It needs to include the specific details of my denial, including when the denial period ends as well as consequences for having an orgasm without permission. I’m finding I’m having difficulty thinking of appropriate punishments. I am not into extreme pain. That just is not my thing. I’m more into mental torture than physical. For example, being told I’m not allowed to edge for a day, that would be he’ll for me. I have to edge daily. It’s the only thing that provides me with some form of relief. Another mind fuck for me would being told that I have 5 minutes to edge and be allowed to have an orgasm but first I would have to cover my clit with orajel and wait 10 minutes. That’s torture for me.
I was wondering if any of my fellow denied friends might have some other suggestions that I could use as punishment? I need to have the rough draft of the contract finished today. Thanks in advance for any advice!
The Best Sex Ever
Jan. 19, 2018
Last night was my 17th day without an orgasm. I edge every day. Sometimes with a toy, sometimes with my hand. Always hard edges and I ride them all afternoon when time allows. My husband has had kind of a hard time lately getting into my obsessing about sex and denial. We had a very long and detailed conversation last night about what I want/need and about what he wants/needs. I know that I need to be more sensitive to his moods and things he goes through. At the same time, as I explained to him, I am 48. I feel like I am at my sexual peak. All credit goes to orgasm denial. I don’t want to ignore this part of my life or not give it the attention it deserves. I want to explore and embrace my sexuality. I don’t know how long I can expect to be on this sexual high, but I want to enjoy the ride as long as I can. After hearing me explain things like that, I feel like he now has a much better understanding and appreciation for what I’m experiencing. He knows that he needs to play a more active role, and he wants to. It truly was one of the best conversations we have ever had. When we were finished we had the most incredible sex, I think, we have ever had. It was filled with passion and ecstasy, love and compassion, and lust and longing. He started simply by playing with my nipples. Squeezing and tugging. It was enough to bring me to a soft edge. That has never happened before. Sounds were escaping from my mouth that I’ve never heard before. I’ve never had more desire for anyone. Ever. Then he made love to me. He stayed close to me, our bodies glued together with our sweat. My entire body was trembling. I had to ask him to stop several times. He caressed my face and our eyes locked as he started his rhythm again. I wanted to cum. I asked him if I could. He hesitated. I know he wanted me to, but he said, “please don’t. Just hold off for me.” I told him that it was so hard not to. He kept moving. He kissed me, he told me he loved me. He held me close as he came deep in my pussy. It was the best sex I’ve ever had, and I didn’t even have an orgasm. I truly gave my orgasm to my husband and he treated it like a precious gift. He loves what I’m doing for him. I never want another orgasm. I want him to have them all.
This is a true story of a consensual sex act between 2 consenting adults . I’ve just never taken the time to write it out. I am inspired to do so now by a “friend” I met on Tumblr.
My boyfriend, who is now my husband, and I had been together for under a year. Our relationship was extremely sexual. We both had shared our sexual fantasies with each other from the beginning. I wanted to be taken roughly and against my will. There was something about the thought of being chased down and being forcibly used by a man that greatly aroused me.
Before we got married, we used to go to this little roadside Motel to have sex. On the hill, above the motel, was a graveyard. One night, before he picked me up for our motel date, he told me to wear old clothes that could get ruined. I was baffled, but did as I was told. It was dark when John picked me up. He didn’t say 2 words to me on our way to the motel. It was very strange. As we pulled up to the hotel, he kept going, up the hill which led to the cemetery. I asked him where he was going. He remained silent. He was starting to scare me.
When we got to the top of the hill, John told me to get out of the car and start looking for a place to hide. I thought he had lost his mind. It was dark, cold, and foggy and there was a damp mist in the air. I didn’t move. Once again, he said, “get out of the fucking car and find a place to hide. I’m going to park this car, and then I’m going to hunt your ass down and when I find you, I’m going to use your holes to satisfy my needs, now get out and run, cunt!” He didn’t crack the slightest smile. He was as serious as I’ve ever seen him. I still sat there, in disbelief that he was talking like this to me. Suddenly he got out of the car, walked around to my side, opened the door, and pulled me out, throwing me to the ground. “Run, bitch!” He said as he got back into the car and pulled away.
I got up and started running, looking for a good place to hide. Now it all made perfect sense. Wearing old clothes, John not talking to me in the car, driving to a graveyard. He was going to rape me. After running until I was completely out of breath, I found a tall tombstone to hide behind. My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest. I tried listening for his footsteps but heard nothing. I peaked around the tombstone and didn’t see him. As I was turning back around, I felt a hand grab my shoulder. I screamed and started running.
He chased me. It was so dark that I could barely see where I was going. Then, in the distance, I could see a dim light. It was in front of a mausoleum. As I got closer, I could see steps leading to the building. As I neared the steps, I felt his hands grab me. I lost my footing and fell against the loosely fastened iron handrail, causing it to fall to the ground under me. My hip felt like it was on fire as I landed on top of the rail. I cried out as pain and fear swept over me.
He quickly used rope to tie my wrists together behind my back and then took a brief moment to savor his victory. The look on his face was one of a hunter who has captured his prey. He put his hand over my mouth and told me not to say a word and that if I screamed, he would hit me. Then, he ripped my shirt open and squeezed my breasts so hard that I was sure they would bruise. He was on top of me at this point and was grinding his cock into my groin repeatedly. Then he pulled on my jeans so hard that the button and zipper completely came off. He rolled me onto my stomach, undid his jeans, and forced his erect penis into my ass without the benefit of any lubrication. It hurt so badly that I began to whimper, so he grabbed my hair and pulled my head up to his and yelled in my ear for me to shut the fuck up.
He put his mouth up to my ear and said, “I know you like my cock filling your ass.” He was right. I loved having my ass fucked. I felt my pussy begin to get wet, but I continued to struggle. Suddenly, John stopped his assault on me and told me to stand up. He used a knife to cut my shirt off of me, since my hands were bound, and then pulled my jeans and underwear all the way off and left them in a pile on the ground. I was completely naked. He grabbed my head, started pushing me towards the car, opened the door, and pushed me inside. He put a gag on my mouth so he wouldn’t have to hear me cry. He drove down the hill to the motel and parked. He got out, walked around, opened my door, and pulled me out of the car. I protested because I was naked, but he had no sympathy. He said that dirty whores like me didn’t deserve to wear clothes and ordered me to walk across the parking lot to our usual room. To avoid being naked in public any longer than necessary, I obeyed. Once inside, he pushed me to the bed, took the gag off of my mouth and replaced it with his cock. He told me if I bit him, he would cut me, and showed me his knife. I had no choice but to allow him to fuck my mouth. He held it in for so long at one point, that I almost passed out. I had slobber all over me from gagging. I know that this turns him on. He usually blows his load when this happens, but not tonight. Tonight, he refrained, saying that he wasn’t finished with me yet. He grabbed my hair and forced me to the dresser, where there was a full sized mirror. John had stuck a dildo to the mirror and told me to suck it while he fucked me. He pushed me over so that I was bent over on the dresser, head right next to the mirror, dildo in my mouth. I could feel the juice from my pussy running down my legs. John loved how wet I was for him. He started panting, saying, “only filthy sluts get that wet when they are being fucked like whores.” I felt something being forced into my ass. Then I realized that he had another dildo and was using it to fuck my ass. All 3 of my holes were being used. I could feel my orgasm quickly approaching. John could feel my pussy start to spasm around his cock. He pulled out of me, right as I was about to explode, forced me on my knees, shoved his cock into my mouth, and said, “whores don’t get to cum” as he shot his load down my throat. He had never done that before. He always made sure I came several times before he would consider relieving himself. Although I was upset that I didn’t get to experience an orgasm, I found myself also being curiously aroused at the idea of not having an orgasm. After we cleaned up, John held me close to him and gently rubbed my hair. I thanked him for making yet another fantasy become a reality. When we woke up the next morning, we made love. This time, he allowed me to have many orgasms. When we were getting ready to leave, I realized that I didn’t have any clothes. He left them in the cemetery. John had a smug look on his face and said, “if you’re leaving with me, you’d better get your ass in the car.” It was a little different being naked, in public, in the daylight. I ran across the lot, trying my best to cover myself. When I got to the car, it was locked. John unlocked his door and got in, deliberately leaving me to stand beside the car, naked. It was humiliating. Again though, just as the night before when he denied me my orgasm, I found myself becoming strangely aroused. He finally unlocked the door and let me in. I couldn’t even be angry with him. I loved him. Who knew that 10 years later, our sex life would be even more incredible and just as adventurous. Who knew that as I’m writing this memory, I would be on day 18 without an orgasm!
A Conversation Between A Husband And A Wife
I started exploring the idea of female orgasm denial a little over a month ago. The more I read about it, the more intrigued I became. I already have the cuckquean fantasy and orgasm denial fits perfectly with that so I talked to my husband about giving it a try. Like most men who have sex, he felt like he needed to provide his wife with multiple orgasms before experiencing his own relief. He felt like he wouldn’t be fulfilling his job as a man, (Tarzan beating chest), if I didn’t cum during sex. He wasn’t as excited as I was about the orgasm denial but said he would do it if it would make me happy.
The first time we had sex after my denial began, my husband felt really bad that I didn’t have an orgasm. I assured him that it was ok and thanked him for allowing me to please him. He has received many blow jobs over the past 13 days and each time we have actual sex, it seems to be getting easier for him to deny me. The harder it gets for me, the easier it becomes for him.
Last night we had mind blowing sex. Filled with passion, lust, and love. It was sensual and erotic. I have found that I now pay close attention to every detail. I feel like if I can show my husband how good I can be, how loving and willing to please him I am, that he may give in and allow me to orgasm. He was on top, my legs spread and in the air. He was holding on to me and thrusting deep inside my entirely dripping wet pussy. So close to orgasm, I had to beg him to stop several times so I wouldn’t go over the edge. I try not to have to ask him to stop because I don’t want to take away from his enjoyment. I’m learning to breathe through an edge until it subsides, but sometimes it’s too much and I have to ask him to stop.
He doesn’t laugh at me when I ask him to stop, but he definitely gets a prideful look of accomplishment on his face. He then tells me he’s proud of me for doing so well as he begins thrusting into me again. I’m rubbing his chest, holding his face, scratching his back, meeting every thrust, moaning uncontrollably. He is lost in pleasure. The look on his face is complete ecstasy. He goes from being a kind, gentle man, into a raw, savage beast when he’s about to cum. He cried out in complete euphoria as he emptied his cock deep in my pussy. As he gradually came down from the intoxication of his massive orgasm, he gently kissed me before rolling off. As soon as he exited my body, I used my hand to scoop his cum from my pussy and put it in my mouth. I had never done this, but I knew it would please my husband.
He smiled lovingly at me, quite impressed with my eagerness. I asked him if, while we were making love, if he had considered allowing me to cum. He caressed my face tenderly while looking deep into my eyes and said, “Absolutely not. Why would I do that when you’re finally becoming such a good wife and realizing what’s important. I find your eagerness and desperation extremely pleasing, and we both know that my pleasure is what matters, right? Your denial really is a beautiful thing.” His words made my pussy throb even more with desire so I sucked his cock until he came again.
When this journey began, I set a goal of no orgasms for 2 months. This ends on March 1, 2018. I have since given total control of my orgasms to my husband. He said that he is going to honor my original goal of 2 months but may extend that time indefinitely. If it please him to do this, then it pleases me to obey him. His pleasure is my pleasure. He will let me know if I need to have an orgasm. He knows what is best for me. I love him.
We are in Maryland. Please message me anytime, about this or anything that’s on your mind!
Deliciously Denied Cuckquean
I got a new toy yesterday. It stimulates both the g spot and the clit simultaneously and the vibrations are controlled by my husband from his smartphone. It’s wonderful. So, yesterday was day 10 of my 2 month orgasm denial. I am constantly aroused and dripping wet. My pussy literally aches to be touched. It’s very difficult to concentrate on anything besides the needy slit between my legs.
I sent my husband a text asking if I could please suck his cock and swallow his cum when he got home from work. He replied that he would think about it and that I should find some good porn for him to watch in case he allows me the pleasure of his cock in my mouth. After reading that message, I had to go to the bathroom at work and rub my clit for a minute.
When he got home from work, John instructed me to show him the porn I found for him to watch. He told me I had done a good job and decided he would allow me to suck his cock, but first I had to insert my new toy into my pussy. John put the vibe on the lowest setting and reminded me that I’m not allowed to cum without his permission as he pushed my head onto his hard cock.
Since I’ve started this journey into orgasm denial, I have discovered that I love sucking cock. I love when he pushes me all the way down on it and makes me gag, but the best part is when I get to taste his cum. That is something I never enjoyed but now I can’t seem to get enough. I don’t waste a single drop. That would be disrespectful to my husband. I continued enjoying his fullness in my mouth as he watched his porn. John began squeezing my butt. He knows that drives me crazy and makes me crave the feel of his throbbing cock sliding into my ass. This caused me to suck and lick his dick with even more eagerness. John told me to look at him and then said, “I bet you’d like me to put my finger in your asshole, wouldn’t you?” As the vibration on my clit continued, John’s words caused me to feel the beginning of an orgasm. I started to moan. His stern voice reminded me that I’m not allowed to cum and he slapped my ass. Hard! I begged him to fuck my ass with his finger but he refused, saying that I was getting too worked up. Instead, he used his finger to rub all around the outside of my hole and told me I was a needy slut.
He also told me that if I couldn’t control myself, he would stop allowing me to suck his cock at all. I told him I would be good and that I would control myself. I explained that I was having a hard time because I had gone so long without an orgasm. Only 10 days but that’s longer than I’ve ever gone since I first started having orgasms. John gently carressed my face and said, “it must be very hard for you to be so needy all of the time, especially since I get to have an orgasm whenever I want. I get to experience the relief that an orgasm brings. Oh, it feels so good! Orgasms are so nice! We talked about this and you said you understood that your role is to always be wet and ready for me to use because my pleasure is all that matters. So far you have done a great job of staying needy for me. In fact, your pussy seems to drip more with each passing day. That pleases me and I know how much you want to please me. You know that your pleasure comes from giving me pleasure. Now roll onto your side, my love, because I’m going to fuck your pussy. That’s right, mmmmmmmm, good girl. Oh baby, your wet pussy feels so good wrapped around my cock. Fuck!” He fucked me like a savage animal.
One of the nice things about my new toy is that it can stay in during sex. This, of course, adds to the pleasure and makes it even more difficult not to cum. John knew I was having a hard time controlling myself so he fucked me harder and harder, thrusting deep into my pussy. His face was filled with desire and passion. He turns into a sexual beast in the bedroom. I am so lucky to have him. I really do want to give him all the pleasure he deserves, even if that means I never get to cum again. Mmmmm all these thoughts are bringing me to the edge. I’m so close. I begged him to let me cum. He laughed at me as he pulled his cock from my soaked pussy and said, “You haven’t even come close to earning an orgasm, my sweet slut. Now, suck my cock and taste your pussy juice. Get used to pussy because once I find a cuckcake, you’re going to be my fluff girl.
You’re going to lick her pussy and get her ready for my cock and after I’ve fucked her good and made her have orgasm after orgasm, you’re going to suck my cum from her pussy and then you’re going to lick her juice from my cock. In fact, that’s the only way you’ll ever get my cock in your mouth. You will be kept denied. All of your orgasms will be given to my cuckcake. You will serve as our clean up girl” I could tell that he was getting closer to blowing his load as he kept talking. With his cock deep in my mouth, he shot his load down my throat. I kept it there and savored the feel of him in my mouth until every last drop of his cum was in my stomach.
I continued to suck his cock until it was soft. I was so aroused. I told John the I really needed to have an orgasm. As a tear rolled down my face, he told me that since I was careful not to spill a single drop of his cum, that he would allow me to hump his leg for 2 minutes and if I could bring myself to orgasm, he would allow it. First though, I had to remove the toy from my pussy, which was now numb from the constant vibration on my clit. I humped his leg but was unable to even get to an edge.
He said, “awwww, that’s too bad, baby. I know how desperate you’ve been for an orgasm. We can try again next month. Maybe 30 more days of denial will make you more desperate.” He kissed me and went to get a shower, leaving me a dripping mess on the bed.
January 10, 2018.
My pledge.
Today is day 9 with no orgasm.
Oh but the edging, the edging is far greater than any orgasm could ever be!
Desire, Love, and Denial
I discovered Tumblr about 1 month ago as I was searching the internet for information about the all elusive cuckquean lifestyle. I was so grateful to find out I wasn’t the only woman who truly fantasized about her husband having sex with another woman. This fantasy, for me, has even more layers though. Not only do I want to watch him with another woman, I want him to tell me that she feels better than me. I want him to compare us and tell me how inadequate I am. I want him to thoroughly be consumed with the pleasure he is being given by someone thinner, younger, and prettier than me while I watch. I want my hands to be tied so that I can’t touch myself while he makes another woman cum. I want to be completely denied any orgasm. When they are finished, I want to be made to sleep on the floor beside MY bed while they cuddle to sleep.
All of this, so far, is just a fantasy because those cuckcakes, if they really do exist, are impossible to find.
In any case, Tumblr has been a great Avenue for me to explore many different fantasies as well as find new ones. I have been reading about female orgasm denial. At first I thought, THESE WOMEN ARE OUT OF THEIR MINDS. However, the more I read, the more intrigued I became and all of a sudden, I would notice that I would become aroused at the thought of not having an orgasm. I started talking to my husband about it. At first, he too thought I had lost my mind. We have a great sex life and he loves making me cum. He is a superior lover and has never left me disappointed. He could not comprehend not pleasing me. It took some convincing, but I finally talked him into trying. The first go round, I made it to 5 days. I was weak and untrained. We went to a beautiful old stone bridge, in a snowstorm, and he fingered me to an incredible orgasm.
It was something we had never done before, so I enjoyed it, but that feeling was soon replaced with disappointment in myself for only lasting 5 days. Now I am on round 2 and I have made it 7 days without an orgasm. The other night, my husband and I were making love. It was filled with passion. I’m so aroused all the time now. We were lying in bed and he started slowly and lightly running his fingers against my pussy on the outside of my undies. I absolutely love that.
He knows how to bring me right to the edge and then stops, leaving me dripping and craving more of his touch. One thing I’ve discovered since beginning my journey of denial, is how much I now enjoy sucking my husband’s cock and swallowing him cum. Almost like I depend on his cum as much as I depend on food. It nourishes my very being. I am eager to take him into my mouth and to please him. I really do derive intense pleasure when I hear my husband moan or feel him thrust his hips, forcing his cock deeper into my mouth. He likes when I take my time and lavish him with love from my mouth.
Next my husband gently pushed me onto my back and placed kisses down my body, stopping between my legs. No one has ever licked my pussy and given me as much pleasure as my husband has. I had to beg him to stop many times in order to not have an orgasm. I’m so afraid that one of these times, he’s not going to stop and that he will make me cum, and then punish me for not having better self control (yep, that’s another fantasy), but this night was just about us loving each other. Tonight, when I begged him to stop, he did.
He then gently lifted my arms and pulled me up to him so that we were facing each other. This is my favorite way to make love because of the intimacy it allows.
There was so much passion between us this night. We groped each other, kissed, rubbed, rocked the bed. The love we have is undeniable. We were both feeling the moment. He was getting close to orgasm. I was ready to give up my denial time so that he and I could orgasm together. I told him I wanted to cum, that I wanted to feel his cock explode with my pussy. I asked if I could cum. He wanted me to as much as I wanted to. I know he almost said yes but, he, in his infinite wisdom and knowing what is best for me, shook his head no and pushed me down on the bed and before I realized what was happening, he had his cock in my ass and yelled out in ecstasy as he came, shooting his load deep into my ass, a look of total pleasure on his face. I knew he made the right decision and I’m grateful for his strength when I am weak.
Tumblr Reject 